I receive a daily Google alert linking me to all published stories about trust, promises, relationships, and so on. When I got this one, I had mixed views.
Link to the full story here http://your4state.com/content/fulltext/?cid=50522
Website Tracks President Obama's Promises To The Nation
Reported by: Jackie Cutler
Wednesday, Jan 21, 2009 @07:28pm EST
FREDERICK, MD - President Barack Obama has been in office less than a week, and although his presidency is a sign of change, many are wondering how much change he'll really bring.His promises range from more jobs, to better education, to less loopholes for big corporations.In total he's made more than 500 promises, and now a website called politifact.com is helping you keep tabs on all of them.Using an Obameter, the website lists all of the promises, which ones he's kept as well as which promises he's broken.So far President Obama has only kept two: appointing a Republican to his cabinet and changing a capital gains tax law.Still, some in the four-state region say perhaps more important than keeping his promise is the energy his presidency brings.If you would like to keep track of President Obama's promises, click here.
I thought - Ok, that's great that people are actually tracking the promises made by a politician, especially one as influential and critical to the world economy as Obama.
But then I thought - Hmmm. How would I feel if there was a website tracking all MY promises??!!
How would YOU feel?
This blog has moved to truthabouttrust.blogspot.com.au and covers a huge range of aspects of trust - from trust in organisations, trust in families and trust in communities. Come and join me there :)
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Monday, January 5, 2009
Good intentions don't build trust
You know the saying "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." What's interesting is when you really think about this. Why is this so?
With the ENP Wall® entente's trust model, I talk about making promises - both implicitly and explicitly. I also talk about expectations and needs. Good intentions, like "we'll catch up", "let's do lunch", "my new year's resolution is to stop smoking", "we should spend more quality time together" - whatever we say to make people or ourselves feel better, are actually promises we're making. They create expectations in people's minds, including our own, and they satisfy our core needs. So, we believe them. We trust them. Unless of course we know it's just talk, in which case we lose even more respect for them every time they say it, including losing respect for ourselves.
Even if the good intentions really were meant, if they don't eventuate, the wall comes crashing down or the trust is chipped away or cracked.
Good intentions don't build trust. Seeing them through, carrying them out, delivering on them - that's what builds trust!
With the ENP Wall® entente's trust model, I talk about making promises - both implicitly and explicitly. I also talk about expectations and needs. Good intentions, like "we'll catch up", "let's do lunch", "my new year's resolution is to stop smoking", "we should spend more quality time together" - whatever we say to make people or ourselves feel better, are actually promises we're making. They create expectations in people's minds, including our own, and they satisfy our core needs. So, we believe them. We trust them. Unless of course we know it's just talk, in which case we lose even more respect for them every time they say it, including losing respect for ourselves.
Even if the good intentions really were meant, if they don't eventuate, the wall comes crashing down or the trust is chipped away or cracked.
Good intentions don't build trust. Seeing them through, carrying them out, delivering on them - that's what builds trust!
Sunday, November 30, 2008
What did we expect?
Trust. Ever increasingly becoming the topic of discussion, and especially in these uncertain and disturbing economic times.
But, I have to ask one question, and we should just think about this for a minute. What were we expecting?
As trust is about relying on people, companies, products and services to deliver an outcome to us, what outcome did we trust in others, in the markets to deliver? What was promised to us that drew us to that place of comfort and trust that made us maybe a little too complacent?
If we are expecting constant and consistent growth with no downside, then we are all in la-la land. There are cycles. Remember, what goes up must come down. Everything ultimately balances out - always. It's the two sides of a coin, the yin-yang. Life is about balance.
Should we expect 'bad' things to happen? No. But I do believe we should expect that sometimes things go well and sometimes not so well.
We should know that ultimately we will be okay - maybe not the way we expect, but our needs will be met, and anyone who promises that things will always be a bed of roses frankly does not deserve to be trusted.
But, I have to ask one question, and we should just think about this for a minute. What were we expecting?
As trust is about relying on people, companies, products and services to deliver an outcome to us, what outcome did we trust in others, in the markets to deliver? What was promised to us that drew us to that place of comfort and trust that made us maybe a little too complacent?
If we are expecting constant and consistent growth with no downside, then we are all in la-la land. There are cycles. Remember, what goes up must come down. Everything ultimately balances out - always. It's the two sides of a coin, the yin-yang. Life is about balance.
Should we expect 'bad' things to happen? No. But I do believe we should expect that sometimes things go well and sometimes not so well.
We should know that ultimately we will be okay - maybe not the way we expect, but our needs will be met, and anyone who promises that things will always be a bed of roses frankly does not deserve to be trusted.
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Lest we forget
I've not posted anything for a few weeks, which now seems a bit slack. What I have been doing is responding to an amazing response to the PR we are currently doing in the lead up to The truth about trust in business hitting the bookstores on 1 May in Australia.
While on one hand I obviously think it's great that there is such a huge interest in the concept of trust, there is also a part of me that is surprised that, across the globe, we have actually forgotten just how critical this 'trust' thing is to all of us.
Like the air that we breathe, like the concerns for global warming, environmental issues, it seems to me that, in all our cleverness, speed and advancement, we have lost site of and forgotten how to care for the very things that sustain us.
Just as we need the basics to survive as a human race - air, water, food - so we also need trust. Why? Because trust is our ability to rely on each other. No man is an island they say. We must be able to rely on others to survive, whether we are relying on the transport to get us to work, our employers to continue to pay us, our partners to love us, our children to behave, our friends to support us - we need trust.
This is why I am now so busy, and it's only the tip of the iceberg!
Check out the new entente website at www.entente.com.au.
Take care
Vanessa
While on one hand I obviously think it's great that there is such a huge interest in the concept of trust, there is also a part of me that is surprised that, across the globe, we have actually forgotten just how critical this 'trust' thing is to all of us.
Like the air that we breathe, like the concerns for global warming, environmental issues, it seems to me that, in all our cleverness, speed and advancement, we have lost site of and forgotten how to care for the very things that sustain us.
Just as we need the basics to survive as a human race - air, water, food - so we also need trust. Why? Because trust is our ability to rely on each other. No man is an island they say. We must be able to rely on others to survive, whether we are relying on the transport to get us to work, our employers to continue to pay us, our partners to love us, our children to behave, our friends to support us - we need trust.
This is why I am now so busy, and it's only the tip of the iceberg!
Check out the new entente website at www.entente.com.au.
Take care
Vanessa
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Trusting others is risky business
I saw this article the other day (see http://blogs.cjonline.com/index.php?entry=6391) that caught my eye. Why do we feel that trusting others is risky?
The whole thing about trust is that is all about our ability to rely on others (and sometimes its about relying on ourselves). If we are relying on others and they let us down, the response can go from mild disappointment to full-on violence, and the response is largely dependent on how important the whole thing was to us, and whether we come from a blind trust or a sceptical trust base.
What we often do, though, is we trust others without telling them:
1. that we are, in fact, trusting them, relying on them
2. what we are trusting in them to do
3. how important that is to us
If we don't articulate these things, then the risk is huge. If we do take the time to articulate these things, we also give the other person the opportunity to let us know if they want to take that on. Can they truly promise to deliver that for you? If not, then you're trusting the wrong person.
Trust is a two way thing, and some of us will blindly trust and often be let down, others will hold back from trusting others and will miss out on great opportunities and wonderful relationships.
Yes, trusting others can be risky, but as they say in financial cirles, the greater the risk, the greater the return! Just make sure you communicate first!
The whole thing about trust is that is all about our ability to rely on others (and sometimes its about relying on ourselves). If we are relying on others and they let us down, the response can go from mild disappointment to full-on violence, and the response is largely dependent on how important the whole thing was to us, and whether we come from a blind trust or a sceptical trust base.
What we often do, though, is we trust others without telling them:
1. that we are, in fact, trusting them, relying on them
2. what we are trusting in them to do
3. how important that is to us
If we don't articulate these things, then the risk is huge. If we do take the time to articulate these things, we also give the other person the opportunity to let us know if they want to take that on. Can they truly promise to deliver that for you? If not, then you're trusting the wrong person.
Trust is a two way thing, and some of us will blindly trust and often be let down, others will hold back from trusting others and will miss out on great opportunities and wonderful relationships.
Yes, trusting others can be risky, but as they say in financial cirles, the greater the risk, the greater the return! Just make sure you communicate first!
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